I give.

Once upon a time, I blogged....

I blogged about random things. I blogged about funny things (at least I think they were funny). I blogged about whatever the fuck I felt like. This is a metaphor for my life. I could do whatever the fuck I felt like doing!

Then September came, and I had a child. And it was and is amazing. But, my ability to go to a movie on a whim is somewhat compromised. Of course, I realized that this change was coming while pregnant, but until you're really in it and watching the hours fly by in between feedings and diapers and laughs and smiles, you just don't quite comprehend the transformation. 

So, I'm back. Blogging has always been a bit of a steam valve for my brain. When the brain gets too hot, it's time to funnel through the fingers. That's not to say that my blog posts have always been a way to vent or bitch, but I just have a lot of feelings...

That shit never gets old.

Nah, I'm not even really here to share feelings at this point. I just need to write sometimes! I'm a total scatterbrain, with clinical levels of anxiety, and writing focuses this very warbly person. And despite my irregularity, I truly enjoy putting pen finger to paper key.

If you've been following along, you've probably put two and two together to realize that I technically will now be considered a "Mommy Blogger." Ugh. BUT, BEFORE YOU ROLL YOUR EYES and click over to one of your 9 other browser windows (imdb, anyone?)... 

I hereby promise not to commit the classic Mommy Blog fouls. 

  - I will not make you think that I live any sort of perfect family paradise

  - I will not sugar coat

  - I will not censor my sailor mouth

  - I will not forget that I am a person in addition to a mom

  - I will not make this blog into talk therapy session or a personal journal filled with drivel

  - I will not have a perfectly decorated home for every holiday (or any holiday, for that matter)

  - There will be no giveaways, there will be no advertisements*

I must, however, admit to you that the following are unavoidable:

  - I will never NOT be a mom, which will likely affect my writing

  - I will always believe that my child is gorgeous and smart

  - I will certainly post pictures

  - I will celebrate victories big and small (but also promise to acknowledge failures)

  - I will include a fair share of day-to-day hum-drum life

  - I will be opinionated, and - because it's my blog - I will think I'm right

In conclusion, I'm back. For today, anyway. I'll probably forget again and not post for a month. 

C'est la vie.

Traycina

Things I wish I could do: Sewing

This is a new feature! Instead of being another one of those how-to blogs, I've decided to write a "teach me how-to".....?

So today, my chosen magical skill is sewing. I wish I could sew. And also, the word sew is kind of weird, considering it's pronounciation. Anyway... I totally wish I could sew stuff! I often walk through places like Bed Bath & Beyond and, when unable to find a shower curtain that meets my needs, throw out the "if only I could sew."

Here are a few more examples:

- Hemming pants. I can't buy regulars because they're too short, but sometimes the longs are ridiculously long! Hence my need.

- Taking in dress shirts for Brian - dude has XL shoulders and neck, with L arms and waist.

- Crafting pillows, curtains, other home decor. This craving surfaces quite often.

- Someday baby bedding - that stuff is ridiculously expensive for seemingly no reason.

- And on that note, some baby clothes! I'm not going to pretend that I could manage to sew clothes for myself, but making a little dress for a 2 year old is probably not that hard.

- Sewing leads well into other crafty things.

Wasn't that exciting? OK, maybe not.

That felt good. How about another?

I enjoy writing. And I also enjoy communicating with people. So it's safe to assume that I enjoy blogging. Although they say that "assumptions make an ASS out of U and .... MPTION" (?), in this case it is truth.

Now, it's no secret, however, that I struggle from time to time with nailing down a topic or really committing to a post. I'll start writing something and whaddya know, I'll drift away (mentally or otherwise) never to return again. Sighhhhh. I blame ADHD. And a lot of blinky lights and move-y things in our house. OK not really, but sometimes the TV is on, and damn that Brian for trying to talk to me while I'm on the computer! Oh and those very very few occasions that I try to bust out a post while at work. It's hard to allow free flowing thought while minimizing your window every 90-120 seconds. (They're watching meeee!)

OK, so there's a relatively interesting intro.... now what? Do I tell you about my awesome writing skillz? Or about my long struggle with ADHD and how it's BLINKY LIGHT!

I'm sorry, where was I....

Nah, I think for now I'll really just ramble a bit until I decide that my eyes are too blurry to see through and I best be getting to bed so I can more easily drag my butt out of bed tomorrow. Did you know that I am sooooooososososo not a morning person? Ask my husband. And my mom.

I get a good amount of motivation to post knowing that others are checking. I don't know how often you check or who you are always, but toss up a comment so I know I'm not writing to dead air space. I find that readers make me feel a bit more accountable for providing entertainment. I make no guarantees that the posts are, in fact, entertaining, but at least I'll typey type out a few coherent thoughts and hit the post button. (Ahh if only it were that simple.)

Speaking of ADHD and typey type, have you tried Twitter? It's like blogging for the ADHD mind -- short form, one sentence, here's my thought, annnnnd DONE. You can do it once a day or once every 30 minutes, depending on how many thoughts you have circling your brain. And NO, it's not like FB status updates where you merely tell people what you're doing at any given time... it's more like the "other" updates where you say interesting things like "Rachel Zoe is totally bananas, but needs to eat, you know, cheeseburgers" and "Would you rather be the top scientist in your field, or have mad cow?"

So I guess what I'm saying is that my blog will be about everything, and yet nothing. Whoa. <--Keanu-style

OK byeeeeeeee.
_____________________________

OMG UPDATE: I tried to post this and it went all FAIL on me and I thought I'd lost the WHOLE THING (which is like, crazy bad, because this was the prologue to my autobiography), and I was about to say "f_ck this sh_t, I'm never f__ing blogging again because this is clearly a sign from GOD that it's not meant to be, and my career as a blogger/writer is over!!!" and then throw my computer down and go wash my face and brush my teeth and get ready for bed. Booyah.

But it turns out it's okay! I'm gonna copy this before I try hitting "publish post" again..... juuuust incase.

If this post and I don't make it thru the night..... come find me on twitter.

Why, God, Why?

I am STILL somehow stuck in a blog rut. I thought separating out my beauty stuff over to my new beauty blog would be helpful! But apparently not. I guess the details of my every day existence seem too mundane for the likes of y'all.... whomever you are out there.

Will pull through somehow, someday!!!

It's time.

"I just feel like I have so much to say but no good place to share it. Oh wait, that blog thing...."

HEY, friends! It's me :-)

Bet you've stopped reading.

Well, things have been really busy. Really frickin busy. Between twice weekly softball games, trying to find a new place to live, visitors, showers, friends, clients, and family stuff, my head is kind of spinning!

The best bet for me is always an outline format. Eliminates that whole extra complication of transitions....

1. The pool is still fucking closed. Softball friend Taylor just moved to the Burlington and can see the progress (whereas my place doesn't have a view). Let's just say that there isn't any. I'm seriously furious and it's definitely caused a big hit to my emotional health.... it's the absolute foundation of my happiness in the summer months and now every nice day I get serious pangs of anxiety feeling like I should be out, by water, somewhere. Hey doc, I need a boost in my SSRI dosage.... yep.

But is there anything I can do about it? It was estimated to be finished by, well, yesterday, and clearly isn't anywhere close. I wish I could get a discounted rent, but I'm afraid to ask....

2. Business is good. Not referring to my day job, obviously. Although that's fine as well. I've booked a number of clients and just did two last week. I'm thinking of starting a separate blog through my makeup website detailing some of my work with the clients and such. Kind of make it a bit more personal and make the potentials and even those that I've already booked feel a little more "in" on the inner-most workings of the arteeest.

So, here's the schedule:
June 23rd -- did a boudoir session, super fun! I love doing these because of the extra "va va voom" factor. Everyone wants to vamp it up.

June 27th -- bride + others. Bride looked exactly like Kendra from Girls Next Door (except 35 and not annoying). Gorgeous!! Did her 15 year old daughter, and her 70 year old mother(s), so there was a good range.

July 11th -- another boudoir shoot shot by pal photographer "Callie V."
July 25th -- bride + others
August 8th -- bride + others
August 15th -- Erin's wedding!! Bride, mother, bridesmaids, self...
August 22nd -- Ashley's wedding to my cousin Mike!! Bride, bridesmaids....
September 12th -- Lisa's wedding!! Not sure of who....
September 26th -- Cretin Derham Hall homecoming girls
October 9th -- bride + others
October 17th -- bride + others

Then I start school on October 20th.... holy cow!

3. Softball is going -- and I have the MOTHER of all bruises on my right thigh. It's literally larger than my hand. It's about 6" in diameter. A fast hit, low-flying ball took a hop off the ground and nailed me. Yeeeowtch!

We WERE doing great until we had a game cancelled -- we've tanked ever since.

4. That's all I can manage for right now.... because otherwise I'll get distracted and never finish.

Hope you've enjoyed!

How to start a fun weekend.

I made the mistake this morning of stepping on my scale. I hope to God I was wearing 40-lb pants.

New look!

What do you think?

Back on the Blog Horse, I'm Lame, Kate's Wedding

OK, so it's been awhile.... specifically 2.5 weeks. Have you missed me?? And by "you" I mean the 6 of you readers that cared to comment on my Roll Call post below. So, Erin, Ali, Melinda, Brian, Missy and Tom - THANK YOU. This is for you, friends!

Life as of late has been.... interesting. And by interesting I mean dull. Oh, and I was in a wedding. I am a homebody that loves to stay put. I somehow manage to keep friends despite the fact that I'd surprisingly rather be in my pajamas on my couch. Did you know that I'm a bit of an introvert? Yeah.... everyone thinks I'm really extroverted, but I'm just really chatty out of nervousness.

Back to what's new.... Kate's wedding was a really grand time. I don't know if you have seen pictures or what not, but she was an unbelievably gorgeous bride. Katie has timeless good looks -- beautiful bright eyes, great bone structure, long lashes and big lips... can't go wrong, right? Seriously though, she looked stunning.

I myself looked awesomely tan. Hooray!!! A victory in and of itself. I've found the cocktail of electric beaching plus self-tanning two days before = the perfect bronze goddess look.

Here are a few other notes from the big day:

1. Kate & Tyge are a cute couple -- they also have very good looking friends.

2. Christos Union Depot is beautiful!!

3. WHY can't the bridal party sit down at some of these weddings? My feet were numb. I had eventually stopped listening to the goings on because I was so focused on rediscovering my toes. I even considered if anyone would notice me sliding my foot out of my shoe and standing barefoot on the altar. It was bad.

4. I love being a bridesmaid.

5. I am annoyed easily. But we'll leave that one cryptically disguised.

6. I never cried on my own wedding day... is that bad?

7. I may not be the most gorgeous bridesmaid, but I am satisfied hearing that people think I'm "so hilarious" and clearly awesome at taking pictures....

All in all, it was a great wedding. I'm entirely jealous and want to plan my OWN again, because that's how I roll, but I'm so happy that K & T had the wedding of their dreams.

Angry models.

I'm HUNGRY. I started a two-week diet yesterday in prep for a friends wedding in... two weeks!.... and I'm really getting in tune with my own hunger. It's an interesting feeling.

But seriously, now I know why models are so bitchy most of the time.... THE PANGS. Gah. I just want to eat a big bowl of pasta, french fries, a bag of chips..... but noooo.

So this diet, you ask [assumption].... well, I decided on a whim the other day to stop at SuperTarget and get carrots, spinach, celery, cucumbers, green peppers, spinach, strawberries and oranges, "salad spritzer" dressing and chicken breasts. Add in eggs, whole wheat bread(the really chunky kind), and some Lean Cuisines... and LOTS OF WATER.... and you have a really really shitty cake.... kidding, you have my daily intake. Granted, this is the end of day two :-)

Sustainable? Nope. Effective? Yeah, you know it! Add in some workouts and I should see some pounds fall off pretty quick. It may be a nice jumpstart into a habit of healthy eating that IS sustainable, however! It's pretty good for the overall awareness to get a better idea of what calories you're ingesting, what your body feels like when you eat a, b and c vs. x, y, and z, etc. I've found that I can be more disciplined than I thought I could. I've found that sometimes more water can solve my issues better than more (craptastic) food. I've also found that a nap is a great cure for nearly intolerable cravings!

Now, weekdays are a different story than weekends -- and tomorrow marks weekend day one. I do have plans to meet the fabulous Melinda for lunch at the Olive Garden (OMG I want a bowl of alfredo and a spooooon), but I've pre-scoped the menu and nutrition info online for a decent choice(s). They have Garden Fare options which are essentially some usual entrees with vegetables replacing the usual potato side. My plan is for the Pork Filettino -- 350 calories for "Grilled pork tenderloin marinated in extra-virgin olive oil and rosemary. Served with broccoli and red bell peppers." YUM! And by picking something pretty low on the caloric scale, I can splurge on a breadstick or two dipped in alfredo. YUMMMMM.



Fuck, looking through this menu is making me SO HUNGRY. I think that means it's time to go to bed!!

Things You Likely Don't Care About. I'll post them anyway....

I posted this on Facebook and thought it was an easy way to cheat a blog post. Tah dah.

1. I've never smoked a cigarette -- not even a puff.

2. I absolutely love Disney movies and have a few soundtracks.

3. I love babies. And kids. They love me too :-)

4. My favorite beverage is and always has been ice water.

5. Brian and I both totalled our cars last December. It sucked big time. I still have neck pain from it.

6. I think I'm pretty smart and manage to know a little bit about everything.

7. I've never broken a bone (except toes, but those aren't even real bones)

8. I've never had stitches either.

9. I have the BEST mom in the entire world -- I'm totally in awe of her poise and faith in dealing with her cancer treatments over the past year. She is absolutely inspirational.

10. I am in loungewear within 3 minutes of arriving home from anywhere.

11. I told my Kindergarten teacher that I wanted to be a Girl Scout Troop Leader when I grew up..... I'm sure there's really good money in that.

12. I hate being made fun of, even if jokingly from friends/family and take criticism VERY harshly and very personally. I've always been pretty sensitive about it. It's made me keep a lot of struggles private for fear of judgement.

13. I LOVED living in dorms and kind of miss it. All my friends were right there with me!

14. I had a really difficult time in life when I was 10-13 and it still makes me cry to think about it.

15. I was a terrible student. I did no homework in Calculus and yet managed perfect tests and a student of the quarter award.... it may have been a bit because of #14.

16. I have 35 first cousins (not including stepfamily), of which I am the youngest. I always felt left behind and I'm sad I didn't get to have the same relationship with my grandparents as the older ones did -- they had all passed by the time I was 13.

17. I secretly want to name my children after the Von Trapps, dress them in curtains and teach them to sing solfege...while living in the mountains of Austria and raising goats (that also sing).

18. Speaking of children, I may or may not have names already picked out.

19. I've spelled my middle name wrong my entire life.

20. On our wedding day, I didn't pee once during the 13 hours I was in my dress.

21. I've been told for years that I'll be a good mom and I absolutely love the compliment... I hope it's true!

22. I have TV crushes on the guy from Chuck and Agent McGee from NCIS. Total nerds, but I dig it!

23. My favorite place to be is up at the cabin on 4th of July weekend... sun, lake, beer, shorts, no makeup, great family... heaven.

24. I've always hated the feeling of being left out, since I am (WAS) the baby of the family and the only girl -- I get really jealous if friends hang out without me.

25. Going from Katie to Katrina was a very unnatural process and still causes me a major identity crisis.

"Making It" In Makeup

While pondering my future career aspirations over the past few weeks and the issues surrounding my start with Aveda, I've found myself considering the option to start doing makeup for weddings as often as I possibly can. Sounds like fun, but there are a few factors to consider:

1. It'd take a great deal of investment to get my makeup kit to a semi-professional level. We're talking hundreds of dollars. More foundation colors & types, more powder colors, eye shadows, brushes, etc.

2. Who even knows WHEN I'll start school, but I'd be hesitant to make any bookings for fall, as I would feel terrible having to cancel.

3. I can imagine that it'll be extremely difficult to get business. Not to mention the fact that I'll be essentially on hiatus from it for the entire duration of Aveda, so once I get to the point that I do have some word of mouth advertisement, I'll be in school an unable to take clients.

4. I know I need to do hair, as a career in makeup is not exactly a sustainable idea. And in order to do that, I need an education and licensure, so it's not like once I get into the groove of special occasion makeup that I can do that 100%. I also really enjoy hair as well, and look forward to delving into that skill a bit further.

All in all, I'm just having a really difficult time trying to map out the road between the here and now and the beginning of my new career.

Until then, I fully plan to start work on a portfolio of makeup looks using some friends as model.... who wants to volunteer??

xoxo

KTM

I thought I was agoraphobic....

Turns out I'm just really lazy and don't like to change out of my pajamas to leave the house.

Life: First Draft

I have a terrible time completing things. Seeing them through to fruition. Getting a job done.

Example: I have about 4 drafted posts for this blog. Thoughts that I start but can never really see through to the end. I'm annoyed with myself.

Do I have lofty expectations for my posts? Thinking they'll be giant ramblings of humorous stories (I always start to type humerous, but that's a bone... well pseudo bone anyway, as that ou is more french, less latin) like my beautiful but strange friend Melinda? Or perhaps eventually reaching some sort of point?

Who the hell knows.

Let's file this away under "evidence I have ADHD" for the day and let it go. Maybe it's better for me to post short random thoughts rather than lengthy novellas. With pictures.

I prefer magazines anyway.

Tah dah

In the interest of ridding myself of my old katematchwedding gmail/google account, I'm moving my blog over here. Hi - welcome. It's giving me strange anxiety. Who the hell cares if I move my blog? Oh no, I have to notify the 5 people that read it! How will I ever accomplish such a task? Riiiiight.

xoxo
KTM

Blogging: A Part Time Job.

I had no idea that blogging could cause such an identity crisis. (It's almost as bad as my issues with some friends/family calling me Katrina and others calling me Katie, but we'll save that for another post that I'll type up halfway and likely never publish.)

A few friends have just recently unveiled new blogs of their own, causing me some blog insecurities.

What am I trying to do here, exactly? Am I trying to be funny? If so, I think I just might be failing. And if not funny, then what?? What, praytell, do I have to offer that others can't? My only answers to that are 1) my amazing metaphor and philosophizing skills 2) my advice-giving /question-answering skills and 3) my tips for makeup / hair / beauty.

I suppose a combination of those things might make for some relatively entertaining posts. "Blush cures depression: it's effect on mood and overall life outlook" could be a start. Or not.

Secondly, who the hell is reading my blog? I posted about this previously, but now that I've added the link to my Facebook page (wooo, exciting), maybe there's like 2 or 3 other people that have looked. They most likely scanned, read the first few lines of something or other and continued with their Facebook stalking of other, more interesting people.

I really don't get why this has caused me such stress. I know I don't want to be one of those really really LAME blogs out there that just blathers on about... God, who the hell cares... so hopefully I can avoid that "category."

Now that I have a "blog network" (aka me and three other friends that are now blogging as well), perhaps a few people will click on my link from their pages and suddently become addicted to my good looks and great writing!

So, based on my above concluded "theme," I'm thinking I'll do some regular features: a beauty product or technique spotlight, a spouting my philosophies segment and perhaps an "answers to life's most pressing questions" here and there.

Sounds like a blog to me.

xoxo
KTM

Yes, I blog, but who reads?? Pass the ice cream.

I'm currently struggling with the logistics of this blog. I know it probably shouldn't bother me as much as it apparently is, but I just love (italics = sarcasm in this use) to overanalyze things. That's a lie -- I DO overanalyze things, but I hate it.

First of all, I'm annoyed by the fact that my email address is katematchwedding -- not exactly the header I want for my bloggingness. Why did google have to give katematch to someone else? And apparently someone who doesn't use English?? (I decided that maybe I had long ago signed up with katematch, so I clicked the "forgot my password" and it came up with a reminder question in another language... something slavic or scandanavian, perhaps? Either way, it wasn't me.)

Secondly, to whom do I send this blog? I know there are a few friends with internet addictions (who shall remain nameless) that may peruse from time to time -- maybe I'm even lucky enough to be listed as a favorite? -- but beyond that, I'm a bit perplexed. I could post the link for all to see, but that leaves me in a bit of a conundrum if I ever want to talk about "those people." Kidding. Kind of.

So, as I sit and ponder these things, I suppose I'm just perpetuating the idea of overanalyzation... I guess maybe I should just move on entirely.... for my mental health.

I found the most AMAZING flavor of ice cream at the grocery store the other day! Now, I can't exactly have ice cream in the house because it will be gone in 36 hours or less from the time of purchase. Yet for some reason, I tempted fate and waltzed down the frozen food aisle and right under the sign for "Ice Cream / Frozen Novelties." And whooooooo boy, this stuff is good..... strangely, it came out of some American Idol ice cream flavor contest. Huh?

Without further ado.... the best ice cream [I've] ever [tasted in the past few years I can remember] award goes to:


Edy's Slow Churned "Take The Cake"

<-- Sunglasses = American Idol?

From the website it's described as "Yellow cake-flavored light ice cream with frosting swirl and multicolored sprinklesss."
(For what it's worth, that color detail in multicolored sprinkles took a lot of extra time. That's committment, people.)

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.... I'm drooling right now. Too bad I polished off the rest last night, or I totally would have had it for breakfast!

So this ends today's segment here on the Random Tangeants Morning Show. "Go fuck yourself, San Diego."

KTM

Well damn.

So I write my first post, get all excited about it, think I'm spouting out some pretty good stuff, hit post.... and realize that it's like a tiny blip of a statement. How do people do it? How does one manage to be entertained by one's own thoughts long enough to make those HUGE posts I've seen?

My guess would be that they're just numb to the fact that other people STOP reading out of boredom. Do you really like to hear yourself talk that much? There are very few people that I find interesting enough to read THAT much of.... and they're either authors or The Bloggess. On very rare occasions, she may lose me, but typically my ADHD is to blame. It's not her fault, really. There are just too many shiny objects in my proximity.

Anyways.... it's amazing that my post about my other post lasted this long. Hope my readers don't have ADHD like me.


Cherry -- who loves shiny things